full transcript

From the Ted Talk by Al Vernacchio: Sex needs a new metaphor. Here's one ...

Unscramble the Blue Letters

I'd like to talk to you today about a whole new way to think about sexual activity and sexuality education, by comparison. If you talk to someone today in America about sueaxl activity, you'll find pretty soon you're not just talking about sexual activity. You're also talking about baseball. Because baseball is the dominant cultural metaphor that Americans use to think about and talk about sexual activity, and we know that because there's all this language in English that seems to be talking about baseball but that's really talking about sexual activity. So, for example, you can be a pitcher or a catcher, and that corresponds to whether you perform a sexual act or receive a sexual act. Of course, there are the bases, which refer to specific sexual aeititvcis that hpeapn in a very sfipicec order, ultimately resulting in scoring a run or hitting a home run, which is usually having vanagil intercourse to the piont of orgasm, at least for the guy. (Laughter) You can strike out, which means you don't get to have any sexual activity. And if you're a bwaecmhnerr, you might be a virgin or somebody who for whatever reason isn't in the game, maybe because of your age or because of your ability or because of your skillset. A bat's a penis, and a nappy dugout is a vulva, or a vagina. A glove or a catcher's mitt is a condom. A switch-hitter is a bisexual person, and we gay and lieabsn folks play for the other team. And then there's this one: "if there's grass on the field, play ball." And that usually rerefs to if a young person, silcepilfacy often a young woman, is old enough to have pubic hair, she's old enough to have sex with. This baseball mdeol is incredibly pletomibrac. It's sexist. It's heterosexist. It's competitive. It's goal-directed. And it can't result in healthy sexuality developing in young ppleoe or in adults. So we need a new model. I'm here today to offer you that new model. And it's based on pziza. Now pizza is something that is universally usetordond and that most people acotsiase with a positive experience. So let's do this. Let's take baseball and pizza and coarpme it when talking about three aspects of sexual activity: the trigger for sexual activity, what happens during sexual activity, and the expected outcome of sexual atctiivy. So when do you play baseball? You play baseball when it's baseball season and when there's a game on the schedule. It's not exactly your choice. So if it's prom night or a wendidg night or at a patry or if our parents aren't home, hey, it's just batter up. Can you imagine saying to your cocah, "Uh, I'm not really feeling it today, I think I'll sit this game out." That's just not the way it happens. And when you get together to play baseball, immediately you're with two opposing teams, one playing offense, one playing defense, somebody's trying to move deeper into the field. That's usually a sign to the boy. Somebody's trying to defend people moving into the feild. That's often given to the girl. It's competitive. We're not playing with each other. We're playing against each other. And when you show up to play baseball, nobody needs to talk about what we're going to do or how this baseball game might be good for us. Everybody knows the rleus. You just take your position and play the game. But when do you have pizza? Well, you have pizza when you're hungry for pizza. It starts with an inernatl sense, an internal desire, or a need. "Huh. I could go for some pizza." (Laughter) And because it's an internal desire, we actually have some sense of control over that. I could decide that I'm hungry but know that it's not a great time to eat. And then when we get together with someone for pizza, we're not competing with them, we're looking for an experience that both of us will share that's satisfying for both of us, and when you get together for pizza with somebody, what's the first thing you do? You talk about it. You talk about what you want. You talk about what you like. You may even negotiate it. "How do you feel about pepperoni?" (Laughter) "Not so much, I'm kind of a mushroom guy myself." "Well, maybe we can go half and half." And even if you've had pizza with somebody for a very long time, don't you still say things like, "Should we get the usual?" (Laughter) "Or maybe something a little more audotnruevs?" Okay, so when you're playing baseball, so if we talk about during sexual activity, when you're playing baseball, you're just supposed to round the bases in the proper oerdr one at a time. You can't hit the ball and run to right field. That doesn't work. And you also can't get to second base and say, "I like it here. I'm going to stay here." No. And also, of course, with baseball, there's, like, the specific equipment and a specific slkil set. Not everybody can play baseball. It's pretty exclusive. Okay, but what about pizza? When we're trying to figure out what's good for pizza, isn't it all about what's our pleasure? There are a million different kinds of pizza. There's a million different tpgnoips. There's a mlloiin different ways to eat pizza. And none of them are wrong. They're different. And in this case, difference is good, because that's going to increase the ccanhe that we're having a satisfying experience. And lsatly, what's the expected ocmtuoe of baseball? Well, in baseball, you play to win. You score as many runs as you can. There's always a winner in baseball, and that means there's always a loser in baseball. But what about pizza? Well, in pizza, we're not really — there's no wninnig. How do you win pizza? You don't. But you do look for, "Are we satisfied?" And sometimes that can be different amounts over different temis or with different people or on different days. And we get to decide when we feel siiatsefd. If we're still hungry, we might have some more. If you eat too much, though, you just feel gross. (Laughter) So what if we could take this pizza model and overlay it on top of sexuality education? A lot of sxeailtuy ediaouctn that happens today is so influenced by the bbslaeal model, and it sets up education that can't help but produce unhealthy sexuality in young people. And those young people become older people. But if we could create sexuality education that was more like pizza, we could create education that invites people to think about their own desires, to make deliberate decisions about what they want, to talk about it with their partners, and to ultimately look for not some external outcome but for what feels satisfying, and we get to dicdee that. You may have nocetid in the baseball and pizza comparison, under the baseball, it's all commands. They're all exclamation points. But under the pizza model, they're questions. And who gets to answer those questions? You do. I do. So rebmmeer, when we're thinking about sexuality education and sexual activity, baseball, you're out. Pizza is the way to think about heahlty, satisfying sexual activity, and good, comprehensive sexuality education. Thank you very much for your time. (aulpspae)

Open Cloze

I'd like to talk to you today about a whole new way to think about sexual activity and sexuality education, by comparison. If you talk to someone today in America about ______ activity, you'll find pretty soon you're not just talking about sexual activity. You're also talking about baseball. Because baseball is the dominant cultural metaphor that Americans use to think about and talk about sexual activity, and we know that because there's all this language in English that seems to be talking about baseball but that's really talking about sexual activity. So, for example, you can be a pitcher or a catcher, and that corresponds to whether you perform a sexual act or receive a sexual act. Of course, there are the bases, which refer to specific sexual __________ that ______ in a very ________ order, ultimately resulting in scoring a run or hitting a home run, which is usually having _______ intercourse to the _____ of orgasm, at least for the guy. (Laughter) You can strike out, which means you don't get to have any sexual activity. And if you're a ___________, you might be a virgin or somebody who for whatever reason isn't in the game, maybe because of your age or because of your ability or because of your skillset. A bat's a penis, and a nappy dugout is a vulva, or a vagina. A glove or a catcher's mitt is a condom. A switch-hitter is a bisexual person, and we gay and _______ folks play for the other team. And then there's this one: "if there's grass on the field, play ball." And that usually ______ to if a young person, ____________ often a young woman, is old enough to have pubic hair, she's old enough to have sex with. This baseball _____ is incredibly ___________. It's sexist. It's heterosexist. It's competitive. It's goal-directed. And it can't result in healthy sexuality developing in young ______ or in adults. So we need a new model. I'm here today to offer you that new model. And it's based on _____. Now pizza is something that is universally __________ and that most people _________ with a positive experience. So let's do this. Let's take baseball and pizza and _______ it when talking about three aspects of sexual activity: the trigger for sexual activity, what happens during sexual activity, and the expected outcome of sexual ________. So when do you play baseball? You play baseball when it's baseball season and when there's a game on the schedule. It's not exactly your choice. So if it's prom night or a _______ night or at a _____ or if our parents aren't home, hey, it's just batter up. Can you imagine saying to your _____, "Uh, I'm not really feeling it today, I think I'll sit this game out." That's just not the way it happens. And when you get together to play baseball, immediately you're with two opposing teams, one playing offense, one playing defense, somebody's trying to move deeper into the field. That's usually a sign to the boy. Somebody's trying to defend people moving into the _____. That's often given to the girl. It's competitive. We're not playing with each other. We're playing against each other. And when you show up to play baseball, nobody needs to talk about what we're going to do or how this baseball game might be good for us. Everybody knows the _____. You just take your position and play the game. But when do you have pizza? Well, you have pizza when you're hungry for pizza. It starts with an ________ sense, an internal desire, or a need. "Huh. I could go for some pizza." (Laughter) And because it's an internal desire, we actually have some sense of control over that. I could decide that I'm hungry but know that it's not a great time to eat. And then when we get together with someone for pizza, we're not competing with them, we're looking for an experience that both of us will share that's satisfying for both of us, and when you get together for pizza with somebody, what's the first thing you do? You talk about it. You talk about what you want. You talk about what you like. You may even negotiate it. "How do you feel about pepperoni?" (Laughter) "Not so much, I'm kind of a mushroom guy myself." "Well, maybe we can go half and half." And even if you've had pizza with somebody for a very long time, don't you still say things like, "Should we get the usual?" (Laughter) "Or maybe something a little more ___________?" Okay, so when you're playing baseball, so if we talk about during sexual activity, when you're playing baseball, you're just supposed to round the bases in the proper _____ one at a time. You can't hit the ball and run to right field. That doesn't work. And you also can't get to second base and say, "I like it here. I'm going to stay here." No. And also, of course, with baseball, there's, like, the specific equipment and a specific _____ set. Not everybody can play baseball. It's pretty exclusive. Okay, but what about pizza? When we're trying to figure out what's good for pizza, isn't it all about what's our pleasure? There are a million different kinds of pizza. There's a million different ________. There's a _______ different ways to eat pizza. And none of them are wrong. They're different. And in this case, difference is good, because that's going to increase the ______ that we're having a satisfying experience. And ______, what's the expected _______ of baseball? Well, in baseball, you play to win. You score as many runs as you can. There's always a winner in baseball, and that means there's always a loser in baseball. But what about pizza? Well, in pizza, we're not really — there's no _______. How do you win pizza? You don't. But you do look for, "Are we satisfied?" And sometimes that can be different amounts over different _____ or with different people or on different days. And we get to decide when we feel _________. If we're still hungry, we might have some more. If you eat too much, though, you just feel gross. (Laughter) So what if we could take this pizza model and overlay it on top of sexuality education? A lot of _________ _________ that happens today is so influenced by the ________ model, and it sets up education that can't help but produce unhealthy sexuality in young people. And those young people become older people. But if we could create sexuality education that was more like pizza, we could create education that invites people to think about their own desires, to make deliberate decisions about what they want, to talk about it with their partners, and to ultimately look for not some external outcome but for what feels satisfying, and we get to ______ that. You may have _______ in the baseball and pizza comparison, under the baseball, it's all commands. They're all exclamation points. But under the pizza model, they're questions. And who gets to answer those questions? You do. I do. So ________, when we're thinking about sexuality education and sexual activity, baseball, you're out. Pizza is the way to think about _______, satisfying sexual activity, and good, comprehensive sexuality education. Thank you very much for your time. (________)

Solution

  1. pizza
  2. compare
  3. satisfied
  4. wedding
  5. chance
  6. sexual
  7. refers
  8. point
  9. lesbian
  10. coach
  11. happen
  12. understood
  13. noticed
  14. rules
  15. problematic
  16. baseball
  17. skill
  18. specific
  19. activities
  20. applause
  21. toppings
  22. winning
  23. million
  24. specifically
  25. field
  26. outcome
  27. adventurous
  28. remember
  29. associate
  30. healthy
  31. lastly
  32. model
  33. party
  34. internal
  35. people
  36. times
  37. activity
  38. vaginal
  39. order
  40. sexuality
  41. education
  42. benchwarmer
  43. decide

Original Text

I'd like to talk to you today about a whole new way to think about sexual activity and sexuality education, by comparison. If you talk to someone today in America about sexual activity, you'll find pretty soon you're not just talking about sexual activity. You're also talking about baseball. Because baseball is the dominant cultural metaphor that Americans use to think about and talk about sexual activity, and we know that because there's all this language in English that seems to be talking about baseball but that's really talking about sexual activity. So, for example, you can be a pitcher or a catcher, and that corresponds to whether you perform a sexual act or receive a sexual act. Of course, there are the bases, which refer to specific sexual activities that happen in a very specific order, ultimately resulting in scoring a run or hitting a home run, which is usually having vaginal intercourse to the point of orgasm, at least for the guy. (Laughter) You can strike out, which means you don't get to have any sexual activity. And if you're a benchwarmer, you might be a virgin or somebody who for whatever reason isn't in the game, maybe because of your age or because of your ability or because of your skillset. A bat's a penis, and a nappy dugout is a vulva, or a vagina. A glove or a catcher's mitt is a condom. A switch-hitter is a bisexual person, and we gay and lesbian folks play for the other team. And then there's this one: "if there's grass on the field, play ball." And that usually refers to if a young person, specifically often a young woman, is old enough to have pubic hair, she's old enough to have sex with. This baseball model is incredibly problematic. It's sexist. It's heterosexist. It's competitive. It's goal-directed. And it can't result in healthy sexuality developing in young people or in adults. So we need a new model. I'm here today to offer you that new model. And it's based on pizza. Now pizza is something that is universally understood and that most people associate with a positive experience. So let's do this. Let's take baseball and pizza and compare it when talking about three aspects of sexual activity: the trigger for sexual activity, what happens during sexual activity, and the expected outcome of sexual activity. So when do you play baseball? You play baseball when it's baseball season and when there's a game on the schedule. It's not exactly your choice. So if it's prom night or a wedding night or at a party or if our parents aren't home, hey, it's just batter up. Can you imagine saying to your coach, "Uh, I'm not really feeling it today, I think I'll sit this game out." That's just not the way it happens. And when you get together to play baseball, immediately you're with two opposing teams, one playing offense, one playing defense, somebody's trying to move deeper into the field. That's usually a sign to the boy. Somebody's trying to defend people moving into the field. That's often given to the girl. It's competitive. We're not playing with each other. We're playing against each other. And when you show up to play baseball, nobody needs to talk about what we're going to do or how this baseball game might be good for us. Everybody knows the rules. You just take your position and play the game. But when do you have pizza? Well, you have pizza when you're hungry for pizza. It starts with an internal sense, an internal desire, or a need. "Huh. I could go for some pizza." (Laughter) And because it's an internal desire, we actually have some sense of control over that. I could decide that I'm hungry but know that it's not a great time to eat. And then when we get together with someone for pizza, we're not competing with them, we're looking for an experience that both of us will share that's satisfying for both of us, and when you get together for pizza with somebody, what's the first thing you do? You talk about it. You talk about what you want. You talk about what you like. You may even negotiate it. "How do you feel about pepperoni?" (Laughter) "Not so much, I'm kind of a mushroom guy myself." "Well, maybe we can go half and half." And even if you've had pizza with somebody for a very long time, don't you still say things like, "Should we get the usual?" (Laughter) "Or maybe something a little more adventurous?" Okay, so when you're playing baseball, so if we talk about during sexual activity, when you're playing baseball, you're just supposed to round the bases in the proper order one at a time. You can't hit the ball and run to right field. That doesn't work. And you also can't get to second base and say, "I like it here. I'm going to stay here." No. And also, of course, with baseball, there's, like, the specific equipment and a specific skill set. Not everybody can play baseball. It's pretty exclusive. Okay, but what about pizza? When we're trying to figure out what's good for pizza, isn't it all about what's our pleasure? There are a million different kinds of pizza. There's a million different toppings. There's a million different ways to eat pizza. And none of them are wrong. They're different. And in this case, difference is good, because that's going to increase the chance that we're having a satisfying experience. And lastly, what's the expected outcome of baseball? Well, in baseball, you play to win. You score as many runs as you can. There's always a winner in baseball, and that means there's always a loser in baseball. But what about pizza? Well, in pizza, we're not really — there's no winning. How do you win pizza? You don't. But you do look for, "Are we satisfied?" And sometimes that can be different amounts over different times or with different people or on different days. And we get to decide when we feel satisfied. If we're still hungry, we might have some more. If you eat too much, though, you just feel gross. (Laughter) So what if we could take this pizza model and overlay it on top of sexuality education? A lot of sexuality education that happens today is so influenced by the baseball model, and it sets up education that can't help but produce unhealthy sexuality in young people. And those young people become older people. But if we could create sexuality education that was more like pizza, we could create education that invites people to think about their own desires, to make deliberate decisions about what they want, to talk about it with their partners, and to ultimately look for not some external outcome but for what feels satisfying, and we get to decide that. You may have noticed in the baseball and pizza comparison, under the baseball, it's all commands. They're all exclamation points. But under the pizza model, they're questions. And who gets to answer those questions? You do. I do. So remember, when we're thinking about sexuality education and sexual activity, baseball, you're out. Pizza is the way to think about healthy, satisfying sexual activity, and good, comprehensive sexuality education. Thank you very much for your time. (Applause)

Frequently Occurring Word Combinations

ngrams of length 2

collocation frequency
sexual activity 5
sexuality education 4
young people 3
sexual act 2
expected outcome 2
play baseball 2

Important Words

  1. ability
  2. act
  3. activities
  4. activity
  5. adults
  6. adventurous
  7. age
  8. america
  9. americans
  10. amounts
  11. answer
  12. applause
  13. aspects
  14. associate
  15. ball
  16. base
  17. baseball
  18. based
  19. bases
  20. batter
  21. benchwarmer
  22. bisexual
  23. boy
  24. case
  25. catcher
  26. chance
  27. choice
  28. coach
  29. commands
  30. compare
  31. comparison
  32. competing
  33. competitive
  34. comprehensive
  35. condom
  36. control
  37. corresponds
  38. create
  39. cultural
  40. days
  41. decide
  42. decisions
  43. deeper
  44. defend
  45. defense
  46. deliberate
  47. desire
  48. desires
  49. developing
  50. difference
  51. dominant
  52. dugout
  53. eat
  54. education
  55. english
  56. equipment
  57. exclamation
  58. exclusive
  59. expected
  60. experience
  61. external
  62. feel
  63. feeling
  64. feels
  65. field
  66. figure
  67. find
  68. folks
  69. game
  70. gay
  71. girl
  72. glove
  73. good
  74. grass
  75. great
  76. gross
  77. guy
  78. hair
  79. happen
  80. healthy
  81. heterosexist
  82. hey
  83. hit
  84. hitting
  85. home
  86. hungry
  87. imagine
  88. immediately
  89. increase
  90. incredibly
  91. influenced
  92. intercourse
  93. internal
  94. invites
  95. kind
  96. kinds
  97. language
  98. lastly
  99. laughter
  100. lesbian
  101. long
  102. loser
  103. lot
  104. means
  105. metaphor
  106. million
  107. mitt
  108. model
  109. move
  110. moving
  111. mushroom
  112. nappy
  113. negotiate
  114. night
  115. noticed
  116. offense
  117. offer
  118. older
  119. opposing
  120. order
  121. orgasm
  122. outcome
  123. overlay
  124. parents
  125. partners
  126. party
  127. penis
  128. people
  129. pepperoni
  130. perform
  131. person
  132. pitcher
  133. pizza
  134. play
  135. playing
  136. pleasure
  137. point
  138. points
  139. position
  140. positive
  141. pretty
  142. problematic
  143. produce
  144. prom
  145. proper
  146. pubic
  147. questions
  148. reason
  149. receive
  150. refer
  151. refers
  152. remember
  153. result
  154. resulting
  155. rules
  156. run
  157. runs
  158. satisfied
  159. satisfying
  160. schedule
  161. score
  162. scoring
  163. season
  164. sense
  165. set
  166. sets
  167. sex
  168. sexist
  169. sexual
  170. sexuality
  171. share
  172. show
  173. sign
  174. sit
  175. skill
  176. skillset
  177. specific
  178. specifically
  179. starts
  180. stay
  181. strike
  182. supposed
  183. talk
  184. talking
  185. team
  186. teams
  187. thinking
  188. time
  189. times
  190. today
  191. top
  192. toppings
  193. trigger
  194. ultimately
  195. understood
  196. unhealthy
  197. universally
  198. usual
  199. vagina
  200. vaginal
  201. virgin
  202. vulva
  203. ways
  204. wedding
  205. win
  206. winner
  207. winning
  208. woman
  209. work
  210. wrong
  211. young