full transcript

From the Ted Talk by Billy Collins: Two poems about what dogs think (probably)

Unscramble the Blue Letters

"I am the dog you put to selep, as you like to call the needle of oblivion, come back to tell you this simple thing: I never liked you." (Laughter) "When I licked your face, I thought of biting off your nose. When I weathcd you toweling yourself dry, I watned to leap and unman you with a snap. I resented the way you moved, your lack of aamnil grace, the way you would sit in a chair to eat, a napkin on your lap, a kifne in your hand. I would have run away but I was too weak, a trick you thguat me while I was learning to sit and heel and, greatest of iltnuss, shake hands without a hand. I admit the sgiht of the leash would excite me, but only because it meant I was about to smell things you had never touched. You do not want to believe this, but I have no reason to lie: I htaed the car, hated the rubber toys, disliked your friends, and worse, your relatives. The jingling of my tags drove me mad. You always scratched me in the wrong pcale." (Laughter) "All I ever wanted from you was food and wtaer in my bowls. While you slept, I watched you breathe as the moon rose in the sky. It took all of my strength not to raise my head and howl. Now, I am free of the collar, free of the yellow raincoat, mmnmaoroged staeewr, the absurdity of your lawn, and that is all you need to know about this place, except what you already supposed and are glad it did not happen sooner, that everyone here can read and wtrie, the dogs in poetry, the cats and all the others in prose."

Open Cloze

"I am the dog you put to _____, as you like to call the needle of oblivion, come back to tell you this simple thing: I never liked you." (Laughter) "When I licked your face, I thought of biting off your nose. When I _______ you toweling yourself dry, I ______ to leap and unman you with a snap. I resented the way you moved, your lack of ______ grace, the way you would sit in a chair to eat, a napkin on your lap, a _____ in your hand. I would have run away but I was too weak, a trick you ______ me while I was learning to sit and heel and, greatest of _______, shake hands without a hand. I admit the _____ of the leash would excite me, but only because it meant I was about to smell things you had never touched. You do not want to believe this, but I have no reason to lie: I _____ the car, hated the rubber toys, disliked your friends, and worse, your relatives. The jingling of my tags drove me mad. You always scratched me in the wrong _____." (Laughter) "All I ever wanted from you was food and _____ in my bowls. While you slept, I watched you breathe as the moon rose in the sky. It took all of my strength not to raise my head and howl. Now, I am free of the collar, free of the yellow raincoat, ___________ _______, the absurdity of your lawn, and that is all you need to know about this place, except what you already supposed and are glad it did not happen sooner, that everyone here can read and _____, the dogs in poetry, the cats and all the others in prose."

Solution

  1. water
  2. sweater
  3. write
  4. knife
  5. place
  6. wanted
  7. taught
  8. sleep
  9. animal
  10. insults
  11. monogrammed
  12. sight
  13. hated
  14. watched

Original Text

"I am the dog you put to sleep, as you like to call the needle of oblivion, come back to tell you this simple thing: I never liked you." (Laughter) "When I licked your face, I thought of biting off your nose. When I watched you toweling yourself dry, I wanted to leap and unman you with a snap. I resented the way you moved, your lack of animal grace, the way you would sit in a chair to eat, a napkin on your lap, a knife in your hand. I would have run away but I was too weak, a trick you taught me while I was learning to sit and heel and, greatest of insults, shake hands without a hand. I admit the sight of the leash would excite me, but only because it meant I was about to smell things you had never touched. You do not want to believe this, but I have no reason to lie: I hated the car, hated the rubber toys, disliked your friends, and worse, your relatives. The jingling of my tags drove me mad. You always scratched me in the wrong place." (Laughter) "All I ever wanted from you was food and water in my bowls. While you slept, I watched you breathe as the moon rose in the sky. It took all of my strength not to raise my head and howl. Now, I am free of the collar, free of the yellow raincoat, monogrammed sweater, the absurdity of your lawn, and that is all you need to know about this place, except what you already supposed and are glad it did not happen sooner, that everyone here can read and write, the dogs in poetry, the cats and all the others in prose."

Frequently Occurring Word Combinations

Important Words

  1. absurdity
  2. admit
  3. animal
  4. biting
  5. bowls
  6. breathe
  7. call
  8. car
  9. cats
  10. chair
  11. collar
  12. disliked
  13. dog
  14. dogs
  15. drove
  16. dry
  17. eat
  18. excite
  19. face
  20. food
  21. free
  22. friends
  23. glad
  24. grace
  25. greatest
  26. hand
  27. hands
  28. happen
  29. hated
  30. head
  31. heel
  32. howl
  33. insults
  34. jingling
  35. knife
  36. lack
  37. lap
  38. laughter
  39. lawn
  40. leap
  41. learning
  42. leash
  43. licked
  44. mad
  45. meant
  46. monogrammed
  47. moon
  48. moved
  49. napkin
  50. needle
  51. nose
  52. oblivion
  53. place
  54. poetry
  55. prose
  56. put
  57. raincoat
  58. raise
  59. read
  60. reason
  61. relatives
  62. resented
  63. rose
  64. rubber
  65. run
  66. scratched
  67. shake
  68. sight
  69. simple
  70. sit
  71. sky
  72. sleep
  73. slept
  74. smell
  75. snap
  76. sooner
  77. strength
  78. supposed
  79. sweater
  80. tags
  81. taught
  82. thought
  83. touched
  84. toweling
  85. toys
  86. trick
  87. unman
  88. wanted
  89. watched
  90. water
  91. weak
  92. worse
  93. write
  94. wrong
  95. yellow